As I type this, I’m on commute, sitting inside the Metro. These days I seem to be consumed with putting words together. That’s how I’m going to call it because it doesn’t seem right to me to call it ‘writing’ since I’m typing bunch of letters putting them together to make some words. In the process, I make what was called in the ancient days, sentences. And later on, I get to have a seemingly vintage word, paragraph.
Some things seem to be from the days back when the dinosaurs roamed the earth. I ask myself why sometimes pretending I don’t understand things, events. But most of the time, isn’t that true for some of us? We know why but we pretend. We make ourselves believe we don’t know. We keep telling ourselves ‘I refuse to believe’ this and that if only to satisfy our selfishness, ego, insecurity, pride, anger.
But if we look closely, and with both eyes wide open, we see how rotten we really are inside. Maybe that’s why we pretend. We sacrifice the most beautiful things life has to offer because we made ourselves believe we don’t understand. Even if we certainly do.
That’s what selfishness, insecurity, pride do to people, I think. They stroke your ego, telling you things are okay just as they are. It even uses verses from the Bible to condemn you without you noticing it. To make you feel sad, lonely, manipulate you into thinking it was right. Even if you know for a fact, it’s wrong. But that’s not the only thing they do. Sometimes they even encourage you. They encourage you to lie some more. They encourage to keep pretending so you miss out on what’s best for you – the truth. Isn’t it amazing how selfishness, insecurity, pride can trick you into thinking they are something else?